Friday, Apr 3rd, 2026 ~ Kyle Dolan

 GO TEAM

"Run Away~!" "Take off~!" "Beat It~!"

Crossword constructor Kyle Dolan frequently appears on Saturday; based on my research, this is his first Friday for the LA Times - all he needs now is a Thursday puzzle, and he gets the "EGOT" of grid making - yay~! ( see 36D. ).  I have mixed feelings about today's offering; the theme is quite fresh and felt Friday-level, five phrases redefined as 'names' for a "collection" of other similar-use phrases, but was dismayed with a triple Natick in the vicinty of Minnesota ( but not Cedar Rapids ); two names dropping off an answer with a semi-vague clue; can't win 'em all, I guess.  Standard grid, no circles, just 11 3LWs, two handfuls of names, two Wines, two Whiskeys.  The themers;  

17. "Pay attention," "Listen up," and "Eyes on the prize": FOCUS GROUP - "Focus~!" group of phrases

24. "Unbelievable!," "That's crazy!," and "What a coincidence!": WILD BUNCH - "Wild~!" bunch of synonymous words/phrases

38. "Gee whiz!," "Golly!," and "Holy cow!": BOY BAND - "Boy~!" band of words/phrases

49. "Sleep tight," "Sweet dreams," and "Don't let the bedbugs bite": NIGHT CREW - "(g)'night." crew of phrases

61. "Check this out," "I'll demonstrate," and "Eyes on me": WATCH PARTY - "Watch~!" party - the only one that I was not familiar with; the standard definition of "watch party" is 'friends who get together' to view, say, the Super Bowl

Don't "Hit the Road", There's More~!

ACROSS:

1. Have a sudden inspiration?: [ GASP ] - , the "inhale" meaning of inspire, plus sudden = sharply

5. Less cockamamie: SANER - Meh.  TAMER, SAFER~? - this is the "structure" of most of the words I have ever missed solving the Wordle - the "_ vowel _ E - R" type, where I simply run out of guesses; there are hundreds of words that fit.  If my first five-letter guess doesn't give me anything, I immediately fill in "_ vowel _ E - R" for the maximum # of attempts

10. Hydropower sources: DAMS

14. "__, sing America": Hughes: "I TOO" - "I had" no poetic clue, filled via perps; name #1

15. Scent: AROMA

16. Rapper who plays Fin on "Law & Order: SVU": ICE-T - short for Odafin, name #2

19. Whiskey mixer: SODA - whiskey #1 - could have been CoLa - SODA was a good WAG on my part, as cola was the go-to choice ( usually diet ) for the Happy Hour crew when I worked at the night club/band bar Casanova's in Cincinnati, OH

20. Place for post-debate interviews: SPIN ROOM - makes sense after it filled, via perps, but then I went looking for some info, and realized it could be this kind of "Spin" room

21. Bug experts, for short: IT PROS - Information Technology professionals, e.g., "Geek Squad"

23. Work in a cast: ACT - work in a cast . . .

26. Implore: PLEAD

28. "That a fact?": "IS IT~?"

29. Tampa Bay team, familiarly: BUCS - the Buccaneers of the NFL - or the cost of corn these days . . .

30. Like folk tales: ORAL

33. Settle, as a debt: REPAY

37. Hospital dept.: ICU - Intensive Care Unit

40. Modeled on: À LA

41. Down source: GEESE - Geese "Up" is when they "take off"

43. Art __: DECO - I like Art Deco

44. Former quarterback Aikman: TROY - announcer with Joe Buck on NFL MNF games - name #3

24 seasons together

45. Winery purchase: CASE - Wine clue #1, you lush . . . then again, I bought beer in case quantity, so I will take that back

47. Pettiness: SPITE

54. Dusk, poetically: E'EN

55. Catch: ENMESH

56. Low-cal drink: LITE BEER - I do the Downs first; otherwise, this could have been DIET COLA

60. Singer Lambert: ADAM - filled via perps, don't know this artist  - name #4

63. Ceremonial event: RITE

64. Responded to an alarm: AWOKE

65. Viking character: RUNE - ah.  Not, say, "ERIK" - from this show - but . . . 

66. Lip: SASS - a "lip" synonym on the edge again

67. Detect: SENSE

68. Getaway spots: SPAs

DOWN:

1. Motion pictures?: GIFs - good one; took me a minute, plus the "G" when I sussed "GASP"

A Graphic Interchange Format moving picture of "Run Away~!"

MP & the Holy Grail

2. Sitting on: ATOP

3. Nonverbal signal: SOCIAL CUE - I was thinking "HAND SIGN", but "sign/signal" was too close for a crossword clue/answer, and it didn't fit, anyway; not familiar with this phrase

4. Mimics a cat, perhaps: POUNCES - Friday vague

5. Starchy palm product: SAGO - one of the triple Natick that got me - not TARO

6. One-way symbol: ARROW

7. Swedish actress Rapace who plays Lisbeth Salander: NOOMI - I did not know who this was until I went to IMDb - she played Elizabeth Shaw in the 'Alien' franchise movie "Prometheus" - name #5

She did not look like this in that movie . . . 

8. Bird in the bush: EMU - "Bush" being the quaint nickname for the hinterlands of  Australia

9. Word after Grand and Cedar, in city names: RAPIDS - Grand in MI, Cedar in IA and MN

10. Row: DISPUTE - rOW, not rOE

11. Part of a squirrel's diet: ACORN

12. French red wine: MÈDOC - Wine clue #2, more here for the lushes connoisseurs

13. Hoard: STASH - the noun, not the verb - I tried AMASS - another good 'edge' word

18. Sp. miss: SRTA - Español abbr

22. Classic car, informally: T-BIRD

25. Light purple: LILAC - followed by . . . 

26. Dark purple: PUCE

Tough to find on one palette - and that's a dark lilac

27. Scooby-__: DOO - name #6

29. Well-known: BIG - one of the bands that frequented Casanova's was "Big In Iowa", a sort of self-deprecating name drawn from a quote here - I was friends with Rick House, one of the guitarists; he, founder Bob Burns, and bassist/WEBN radio host Ken Glidewell have since passed away . . . sheesh

31. Winona of "Stranger Things": RYDER - name #7

32. Actor Vigoda: ABE - name #8

34. Work together: PARTNER UP - a unique fill

35. Skin soother: ALOE - very much NOT a unique fill

36. Happy cry: "YAY~!" - "yay, I finally got my ta-DA~!" when I filled in the correct word at 5A.

38. Heart throbs: BEATS

39. Figs.: NOs - abbr, figures & numbers

42. Plots: SCHEMES - nailed it

44. Haberdashery accessories: TIE BARS - There's two kinds - I wanted TIE TACkS - more here

The concrete rebar/epoxy connections on the left

46. Both sides of America?: SCHWAS - very clever - the phoneme, /ə/, when saying /ə/-MEH-rik-/ə/; it's the most common sound in the English language - more here

48. Tiny sound: PEEP

49. Gets warmer?: NEARS - think the guessing game, where someone is getting closer or further from some hidden item, and the other person says "colder, cold, warm, warmer, hot, HOT~!"

50. Birthplace of novelist Kiran Desai: INDIA - Sheesh.  Friday.  Half WAG on my part; name #9

51. Exams for future MBAs: GMATS - not LSATs, not MCATs, this test is for getting into schools for the acquisition of a Master of Business Adminstration degree

52. John with an EGOT: ELTON - I always get fooled by "John" being his last name, #10

53. Threads in tea lights: WICKS - Friday clue, but clever

57. You, once: THEE - Dah~!  I tried THOU

58. Peak near Catania: ETNA - yada yada, I threw this volcano name in, and "ding~!"

59. Whiskeys that are typically more dry than bourbons: RYES  - Whiskey #2, the basis for the drink called a Manhattan, which reminds me of the only time I ever tasted this liquor.  Growing up, we had watered down iced tea; a treat was a can of full-sugar soda; the adults would have a "Manhattan" at holidays; I figured it must be even better than soda, the "nectar of the gods" - until I tasted it - blech~!

62. Speechless feeling: AWE - not knowing "why" the adults really drank Manhattans certainly left me speechless regarding its taste & lack of sweetness

Splynter

Grid Flow 29.2

Thursday April 2, 2026 Kiran Pandey

Kiran Pandey has been constructing puzzles for a few years now, but this is his LAT debut. Congrats!
This grid features a less common mirror image symmetry, and that's a reflection of its creator. 

55A. Some lead roles, or features of 3-, 7-, and 11-Down?: TITLE CHARACTERS. Each film TITLE has special CHARACTERS (like in a good password) that have been used to create a phrase found in movie reviews. Note that none of these movies actually fit the answer in the traditional sense, it's just the punctuation we're looking at.

3D. "M*A*S*H," in a way?: STAR VEHICLE. A STAR VEHICLE is a film specifically designed to showcase the talents of a well-known performer. The "stars" in this one are actually asterisks, but I still rate it 3★'s.

7D. "E.T.," in a way?: PERIOD PIECE. A PERIOD PIECE is a movie set in a specific, earlier historical era, often characterized by lavish production design, costumes, and settings that evoke that time. Period.

11D. "Face/Off," in a way?: SLASHER FILM. A SLASHER FILM is a sub-genre of horror films involving a killer stalking and murdering a group of people, often by use of blades or sharp tools. Lovely. I like horror films but not slashers with their gratuitous violence.

Fun theme. Kiran is new so he doesn't know that themers are supposed to go horizontally...kidding! I liked the mix of downward themers and discovering the revealer across near the end. He also includes several other nice long vertical fills, which add sparkle, but also leaves us will a lot of 3LW & 4LW. Overall, a good Thursday effort.

M0▽!N9 ()n:

Across:

1. Rae of "Barbie": ISSA. ISSA Rae is a popular American actress, writer, and producer. She is a living doll!

5. Baseball card giant owned by Fanatics: TOPPS.

10. Covert summons: PSST.

14. Court dividers: NETS. Court dividers: BARS.

15. Fast train in the Northeast: ACELA.

16. Hoppy drafts: ALES. The perfect brew for Easter week!

17. Insta post: SNAP. Instagram is a social media network featuring SNAPshots and short videos.

18. Untamed: FERAL. 

19. Namesake of a speed ratio: MACH. Ernst MACH defined velocities compared to the speed of sound, commonly used as unit of air speed where MACH 1 is 761mph (the speed of sound at sea level).

When I'm in a hurry, I shave at 2,283 mph.

20. Cause of inflation: AIR.

21. Spotty?: STAINED.

23. __ Lanka: SRI.

24. Celestial explosions: NOVAE. Had to wait for perps for the final letter to determine if we were using the Latin or English plural.

26. "__ a chance": NOT. 

27. Bygone anesthetic: ETHER. 

29. Standing straight: ERECT.

30. Church headquartered in SLC: LDS. The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is located in Salt Lake City, Utah.

31. "Shrinking" actor/co-creator Goldstein: BRETT. BRETT Goldstein is an English actor, comedian, podcaster, producer, and writer who is perhaps best known for his role as Roy Kent in the Apple TV+ sports comedy series Ted Lasso. I saw him in a stand-up special on HBO and he was surprisingly good.

32. The Phanatic's team, on scoreboards: PHI. The Phillie Phanatic is the mascot of the Philadelphia Phillies baseball team. He is one of the highest paid mascots in MLB, earning $200K per year! I'm green with envy.

33. Basket made on a rebound: TIP-IN. Part of the madness that is March. My alma mater, UVa, runs hot or cold. They once lost in the 1st round, then won it all the following year. This time they didn't make it past the 2nd round. Oh well, there's always next year...

35. Form 1099 agcy.: IRS. The Internal Revenue Service is the agency that is responsible for collecting U.S. federal taxes.

36. Dry as a desert: ARID. I guess we are going through my whole medicine cabinet today.

37. Soul singer Baker: ANITA. ANITA Baker is an American jazz and soul singer known for her sophisticated, romantic ballads.

38. Creative degs.: MFAS. Masters of Fine Arts are graduate degrees in visual arts, creative writing, film, or performing arts. 

40. Campaign-funding gps.: PACS. Political Action Committees are groups that pool campaign contributions from donors to support or oppose political candidates, legislation, or ballot initiatives.

41. "The Hunger Games" ally of Katniss: PEETA. Katniss Everdeen and PEETA Mellark, the "star-crossed lovers" from District 12, evolve from reluctant allies in the 74th Hunger Games into a deeply bonded couple.

42. Trig ratio: SINE. Trigonometric should not be abbreviated because SINE is the full name of the function. Its abbreviation is SIN.

43. Weekly skit show, familiarly: SNL. Ye olde Saturday Night Live.

44. Symbol produced by pressing shift+5: PERCENT. % - hey, it works!

46. Cell service letters: LTE. Long-Term Evolution is a 4G wireless broadband technology that provides high-speed data for mobile devices.

47. Just make do: EKE BY. I'm not sure this is proper English. “To eke” can be used by itself meaning to stretch a limited resource. “She eked the meager budget to cover expenses.” Or, more commonly, it is used with “out” as in, “He managed to eke out a living.” Seems like he was going for "squeak by."

49. Spanish infinitive: SER. SER means "to be." An infinitive is the base form of a verb, often preceded by "to" (e.g., to walk), that functions as a noun, adjective, or adverb within a sentence.

50. "Darn it!": AW MAN. 

52. Add up to: ARE.

54. Connecticut Ivy Leaguer: ELI. A student from Yale in Saybrook, Connecticut.

55. [theme]

64. Hat part: BRIM.

65. Indulge: HUMOR.

66. Group of three: TRIO. Now you're checking out my vitamins?

67. Turn down: DENY.

68. "But of course!": OH YES. 

69. Goes on and on: YAPS. FuzzyBrain YAPS when we get a delivery. Better than a doorbell!

Buster guarding the house.

Down:

1. Absurd, as a scheme: INSANE. That's crazy!

2. Shenanigans of the upper class?: SENIOR PRANK. This is a trick! "Shenanigans" is almost always plural, but seems odd with a singular answer. 

3. [theme]

4. Nile viper: ASP.

5. 27th U.S. president: TAFT. As you can see, William Howard TAFT had a sweet tooth. They even named Salt Water Tafty after him.

6. Passenger ships: OCEAN LINERS.

7. [theme]

8. Temporary water provider: PLANT SITTER. A PLANT SITTER comes to your house while you are away. They typically charge $20/hr for just watering, but it can be more if they keep them company.

9. Red tag event: SALE.

10. Cooking spray brand: PAM. 

11. [theme]

12. December tradition in some offices: SECRET SANTA.This is a tradition in which staff members are randomly assigned a coworker to whom they give a gift, often with a price limit. 

13. Gym top: T-SHIRT. While gym is short for gymnasium, T-SHIRT isn't short for anything. It's just shaped like a T. The only way to shorten a T-SHIRT is to make it a crop top.

21. Ready: SET. In America, we say, "On your mark, get SET, go!" In Britain, it's often, "Ready, steady, go!"

Thank goodness we don't use starting pistols anymore.

22. Former Interior Secretary Haaland: DEB. DEB Haaland was the first Native American to serve as a Cabinet secretary. She is currently running for governor of New Mexico.

25. Litmus reddeners: ACIDS. This is a test.

28. Takes a little off the top, say: TRIMS.

33. Cassette: TAPE. A 90-minute cassette has about 440' of tape inside - that's 1-1/2 football fields long all over the seats of my car! Don't ask me how I know.

34. Bread baked in a tandoor: NAAN.

36. Church recess: APSE. 

39. Observed: SEEN.

44. Combustible pile: PYRE.

45. Soft mineral: TALC. Can't stay out of my medicine cabinet, can you?

48. Pleasant, as a summer night: BALMY.

51. Good at banter, say: WITTY. Better than corny!

53. Parrot: ECHO.

54. "I'm all __!": EARS. ...said the field in Iowa. OK, that was corny.

55. Up in the air, briefly: TBD. To Be Determined.

56. Great vexation: IRE. I'm Really Enraged. Wait, that wasn't an abbreviation.

57. Soft metal: TIN. Like my old Band-Aid box, but stop snooping around my bathroom!

58. "You don't see that every day!": HUH.

59. Poehler who co-founded the Upright Citizens Brigade: AMY. From SNL to Parks & Rec, AMY has always been a dependable comedienne. 

60. Fish-to-be: ROE. 

61. Bullpen stat: ERA. Another baseball clue, this is the Earned Run Average - the average number of earned runs a pitcher allows every nine innings, with lower numbers indicating better performance.

62. Fabric tear: RIP.

63. Request for a tropical getaway, perhaps?: SOS. Fun clue. SOS is not an abbreviation of anything, it's just the letters corresponding to a Morse code distress signal that are easy to remember and type.

Godspeed, Artemis!

Be good. RB

Wednesday, April 1, 2026 - Tara Holland

 

Theme:  "Fool me once, shame on you.  Fool me twice? ... "

 

Puzzling thoughts:

 

Whom else but the resident "Stooge" should be the reviewer of this raucously, racy, risque rhapsody of rapport?  I can't think of anyone.  And who's fooling who?  Have I (46-across: MOI) ever led you folks down the path of presumptive prevarication?  Pshaw!

 

So, let's have at it!  Who's ready to be played the fool? I'll fill you in while describing the "fill"

 

BTW, kudos to Tara Holland - the puzzle constructor - who's been seen published at the LA Times twice in 2025

Across:
1. Tops (off): CAPS.  As in limits the amount of in a drink/alcoholic beverage? 😕

5. Shopping aids: LISTS. A must for this Stooge when he goes grocery shopping

10. Loops in on the sly: BCCS.  I am not that "sly", nor do I have a family stone

14. Tons: A LOT.  I think I was approached by a realtor who once said: "I have tons for sale in this new housing development ..."

15. Foe: ENEMY.  I don't think you could substitute the word enemy into the folktale when the Giant encounters Jack at the beanstalk: "Fee, Fi, [enemy]... I smell the blood of an Englishman"

16. "Excuse me ... ": AHEM.  Pardon my interruption 

17. "That's the last time!": NEVER AGAIN.  But what about the first time? 

19. __ monster: GILA.  The "G" is pronounced like an "H"

20. Standard: NORM.  Or, how about cluing it as a bar "fixture" at Cheers!?

21. Bright: CLEVER.  Witty, perhaps; I don't think of "bright" with being clever

23. The Proclaimers hit subtitled "500 Miles": I'M GONNA BE.  Never heard of this tune before

28. Watchful: ALERT.  3 cups of coffee in the morning makes Moe alert

29. D.C. figure: POL.  I tried SEN first, but to no avail

30. Yardstick, e.g.: RULER.  My ruler only went 12" in length, but I always was the shortest person in my class

32. Top no. in a blood pressure reading: SYS.  Short for SYStolic Pressure - which measures the force in your arteries when your heart beats

33. Baby's bodysuit: ONE-SIE. I hear that the designers of these began making two-sies for parents who had twins

37. Some high-end insulated mugs: YETIS.  A brand name for a drinking vessel, but literally, wouldn't a Yeti in the wild also have an insulated "mug"?  See the "hairy expression" insulating this beast's mug:

39. Is apathetic: DOESN'T GIVE A HOOT.  This reminded me of an old ad, featuring an owl that promoted good citizenship and environmental responsibility when he said: "Give a hoot; don't pollute!"

44. __ squash: ACORN.  Hand's up from anyone who's been reading this blog so far, and thinks that Moe is just completely "nutty" today??

45. Balanced: STEADY. Getting more and more difficult for me as I progress through my seventies

46. Pronoun for Miss Piggy: MOI.  Already used in my intro

49. "West Side Story" role for Rita and Ariana: ANITA.  Actors Moreno and Grande played the role of Anita in the movie adaptation (original and remake).  I thought MARIA was the role, but I was incorrect.  According to a source I found on the Internet: "Anita's the girlfriend of Maria's older brother, Bernardo, the leader of the Sharks, the Puerto Rican street gang at war with the Jets. The Jets are the white gang that was co-founded by Tony, Maria's love interest and the Romeo figure. Anita is Maria's friend and confidante, like an older sister to her"

51. With it, once: HEP. Hmm ... no Moe-ku's so far?  Ok, let's try this one - if no one else gets it I know that my fellow blogger Splynter will:

        Old-time hockey star

        Will suss out the cool dudes, by

        Giving (them) a HEP check 

52. Bank nos.: ACCTS.  My checking account number and SSN are the same: 123 45 6789

54. "Should've listened to me!": TOLD YOU SO.  This could've been clued as the title of a Randy Travis hit song: "(I) Told You So"

58. Markets: STORES.  See 5-across for what I bring to markets/stores.  BTW, do you call the facility where you buy food items a supermarket or a grocery store?

60. One of many, in a string of pearls: BEAD.  Don't let this one fool you

61. "Song of Solomon" novelist Morrison: TONI. She shows up a lot in crossword puzzles

62. [reveal] - save for later

68. Many a four-hour film: EPIC.  I can barely stay alert for a two-hour movie

69. Actor Davis - known for "A League of Their Own": GEENA.  Don't let this one fool you

70. Japanese wheat noodle: UDON. Or this one

71. [reveal] - save for later

72. Go-between: ENVOY. Or this one

73. [reveal] - save for later

Down:
1. Country with the world's largest moose population: Abbr.: CAN.  CSO to CanadianEh! Can you attest that there are more moose in CANada than anywhere else in the world?  Have you any moose encounters you care to share with us?

2. Craft brewer's brew: ALE.  Let me tap into this one ...

3. Perspective, for short: POV.  Point Of View

4. Courtroom fig.: STENO.  Makes me think back to the old TV courtroom show, Perry Mason

5. Take in, in a way: LEARN.  This clue/answer made me rethink my response to 21-across (CLEVER).  I wonder if anyone else saw that a four-letter word for "take in" is in the word "learn"

6. Director Bergman: INGMAR.  Note:  The clue read "Director" Bergman, not Actor Bergman.  Did anyone try to sneak Ingrid into the "grid"?  Fun Fact:  Ingmar Bergman is not related to the actor, Ingrid Bergman, but he did marry a woman named Ingrid ...

 

7. Body of water: SEA.  

8. "That's enough!" letters: TMI. Too Much Information

9. Lip-__: SYNC.  Here is a video that you might want to lip-sync the lyrics to

10. Bread traditionally boiled then baked: BAGEL.  My favorite bagel is an onion one, toasted, and then adorned with some smoked salmon and a schmeer of cream cheese - capers, too, if available 

11. Scallion relatives: CHIVES.  Who else thought ONIONS fit here?

12. The "log" in the snack ants on a log: CELERY.

 

13. Really stings: SMARTS.  As someone who has been stung by a baby scorpion I can attest that this REALLY, REALLY smarts

18. Actor Perlman: RON. I knew that Rhea could not be the answer as it had one too many letters in the name.  Fun fact:  Are Ron and Rhea Perlman related? "No, Rhea Perlman and Ron Perlman are not related. Despite sharing a last name, they are two separate actors with no family connection. Rhea Perlman is known for her role in Cheers and for being married to Danny DeVito, while Ron Perlman is known for Hellboy and Sons of Anarchy" [random Internet source provided by AI]

22. Ring in a rodeo ring: LARIAT. 

23. Apple gadget: IPOD.  Is an iPod really a "gadget"?

24. Part of MSG: MONO. Want to learn more about MonoSodium Glutamate? Click here

25. Merriment: GLEE.  Chorus groups were originally called "Merriment Clubs" but someone shortened the name to Glee Club

26. Accept the truth of: BUY INTO. Heh, heh, heh ... 😈<== impish Moe.  Are you buying into my blog, so far?

27. Mtn. stat: ELEV.  Moe-ku:

 

        French student mountain

        Climber enjoys wordplay: They're

        [an] Elev Élevé

31. Summers in France: ETES. Speaking of French ... 

34. Govt. ID issuer: SSA.  Again, mine is 123-45-6789.  Feel free to use it

35. To be safe: IN CASE. But, just in case that SSN does NOT work please don't try it again .. 😀

36. __ mess: classic English dessert: ETON.  New clue for me.  This concoction:

38. Pronoun for Miss Piggy: SHE.  Clecho - see 46-across

40. Moxie: GRIT.  

41. Island known as "The Gathering Place": OʻAHU.  It's also a place where lucky tourists get lei'd

42. Words of appreciation: ODES. This is almost a Friday-like clue

43. Form instead of from, e.g.: TYPO. The autocorrect feature on my technology devices gets a lot of work

46. Ibsen's "The __ Builder": MASTER.  Moe-ku:

        Renowned fisherman

        Taught course on lures and hooks: He's

        A MASTER baiter

47. Cuttlefish cousins: OCTOPI.  With so many arms, why aren't they called a "cuddle" fish? 😏

48. Legendary: ICONIC.  When something is iconic, what comes to mind for you?  

 

50. An all-white animal with pink eyes, maybe?: ALBINO.  Don't be (53-down. Treat alternative:) TRICKed by this clue and answer

55. Airport flight condition: DELAY.  Don't be (53-down. Treat alternative:) TRICKed by this clue and answer

56. Initialism of Young Adult Fiction: YAF. Or this one

57. "Smell" in Scotland: ODOUR. Or this one

59. Herb or spiritual mentor: SAGE. Did this one fool you?

63. What only the most capable crossword puzzle solvers use: PEN. Surely you jest, Moe! "No, I don't, and please don't call me Shirley" <== Famous quote in the movie "Airplane"

64. Part of RPM: REV. I am so confused, Moe ... WTF is going on???

65. Dashboard image that is located between the Tach and the MPH dials: ODO. Is this just some kind of green paint??

66. A fitting text message that Moe sent to his alter ego while blogging this puzzle: LOL!

67. A TV show that would probably have classic 62-across skits: SNL

62 - across. What Chairman Moe did to his audience today: APRIL FOOLS!

71 - across. With 73-Across, classic internet prank pulled by this puzzle's longest answers: RICK.

73 - across.  See 71-Across: ROLL.

WHAT?  This grid didn't appear in your newspaper or AcrossLite / online edition??? 

Ok, Moe.  You had your fun with us.  Ha! Ha!  Can you please give us the REAL version and explanation?

Well, since you asked politely, here goes.  First, the real clues/fill that Tara used, and that I substituted for to make an alternate puzzle:

60-across. Like a turkey burger: LEAN.  My burgers have an 80% LEAN / 20% FAT ratio.  Turkeys are a holiday meat - for me, anyway

62-across. Began to relax: LOOSENED UP.  Moe-ku:

 

        Camper told his shrink

        He dreamt of tepee and yurt.

        Guess he's just two tents 

 

69-across. Made a 43-Down, say: ERRED.

 

70-across. Pre-migraine experience, for some: AURA. 

 

72-across.  Financial obligations: DEBTS. 

 

50-down. "Ready?": ALL SET. 

 

55-down. Monopoly cards: DEEDS. 

 

56-down.  Celebrity chef Martin: YAN.

 

57-down.  Like some headphones: ON EAR. The only kind that Moe will wear

59-down. Vehicle often steered with the feet: SLED.  LUGE fits, too

63-down. Underground rock: ORE.  I hear a good place to find ore is in ORE.

 

64-down. Round figure?: ORB. 

65- down. Twosome: DUO. 

 

66-down. Clickable link: URL.  Part of today's prank

 

67-down. Bestie: PAL.  BFF was tried and failed

 

71 - across. With 73-Across, classic internet prank pulled by this puzzle's longest answers: RICK.

73 - across.  See 71-Across: ROLL.

What in the heck is going on here???

 

When you tried to click on all of the hyperlinks I used in my recap today, you were rickrolled.  As [Merriam-Webster] defines: 

"Rickrolled" (or rickroll) is an internet slang verb and prank where a user is tricked into clicking a disguised hyperlink that leads to the music video for Rick Astley's 1987 hit song, "

Never Gonna Give You Up". It is a bait-and-switch tactic designed to annoy or humorously surprise the viewer

 

The five longest answers in the puzzle progressively "pull"/spell out the title in this song:  

 

NEVER AGAIN 

I'M GONNA BE

DOESN'T GIVE A HOOT

TOLD YOU SO 

LOOSENED UP   

 

And that's about as simple a way as I can explain it!

 

I highlighted below the left-to-right progression of the key words to the Rick Astley tune you heard today, ad nauseam, provided you clicked on the links. This  puzzle was a real "hoot".  The words used were all in-the-language and well-clued. The reveal was at first unknown to me, but when I googled the phrase "rickroll" it all made sense

 

Kudos again to Tara Holland for providing this blogger with his most favorite puzzle to date! This was truly amazing - I hope you all enjoyed both the real and the April Fools puzzles today

 

Here is the REAL grid!