Theme: Precisely as stated.
1. Cybersecurity event: HACK.
5. Far off: REMOTE.
11. Sad: LOW.
14. __ vera: ALOE.
15. Camera holder: TRIPOD.
16. Org. with a flower on its seal: EPA. Environmental Protection Agency.
17. [Theme clue}
19. Range pts.: MTS. Mountains. An abbreviated clue calls for an abbreviated answer.
20. African animal with features similar to zebras and giraffes: OKAPI.
21. Singer DiFranco: ANI. Sure, she's released more than 20 albums, but did she ever expect to be so popular in crosswords?
22. Verbal nudge: DO IT.
23. Capitol fig.: SEN. A figure that might be seen around the Capitol is a Senator.
24. [Theme clue]
28. Documentary podcast about legends: LORE. DNK (did not know), but not hard to guess.
29. Wrapped up in court?: ROBED. Judges wear robes in court, and are therefore ROBED.
33. Speaker at a gig: AMP. Gig is a short word for a temporary job, often a live concert or stage performance, and amp is short for amplifier, part of the sound system used on stage. It is technically not the same thing as a speaker, but I'll leave that to the technicians.
35. Part of Amelia Bedelia's outfit: APRON. Amelia Bedelia, a character in children's books by Peggy Parish, is a housekeeper who takes things too LITERALLY. When told to dust the furniture, she obliges by putting dust on the furniture. Here she is "putting the lights out."
42. Instagram upload: PHOTO.
43. Tabby: CAT.
44. French twist, e.g.: UPDO. An updo is a hairstyle that lifts hair UP off the neck into a hairDO. A French twist is one such style.
45. "The Masked Singer" judge Ken: JEONG. DNK. I'd had my fill of singing competitions on TV before this series debuted.
48. Electronic music duo __ Punk: DAFT. The masked duo took their name from a negative review.
50. [Theme clue]
53. Workplace of some RNs: ICU. Some Registered Nurses work in the Intensive Care Unit.
56. Samovars: URNS. A samovar is a Russian urn, used for boiling water and brewing tea.
57. Egg __ yung: FOO. Yummers! This can be vegetarian or even vegan.
58. Lampshade-shaped candies: ROLOS.
60. Level the playing field?: MOW.
61. [Theme clue]
64. Smooch in public, briefly: PDA. Public Display of Affection.
65. Coin that fittingly weighs five grams: NICKEL. Fitting, I suppose, because it's worth five cents.
66. No longer feral: TAME. A feral animal lives in the wild but is descended from domesticated individuals -- like most pigeons today! If you take a feral animal into your home and it becomes accustomed to you, it is now tame.
67. "That lady?": HER.
68. Overcast, say: DREARY. Like Los Angeles during May gray and June gloom.
69. Smell: ODOR.
Down:
1. Brand of mandarin oranges owned by The Wonderful Company: HALOS.
3. Podcaster O'Brien: CONAN.
4. "__ the change": KEEP.
5. Rd. with a no.: RTE.
6. Significant span: ERA.
7. King with a touching story?: MIDAS. Dionysus, the Greek god of wine, granted a wish to King Midas of Phrygia (Turkey), who said, "I hope that everything I touch becomes gold." That seemed great until he touched his breakfast, which turned to gold, and then hugged his daughter. Oops!
8. Warm-up act: OPENER.
9. Classic Ford named for an Italian city: TORINO. The city is AKA Turin.
10. Masthead pros: EDS. In publishing, a masthead is a list at the top of a page that includes the names of editors, writers, and owners, as well as the title of the newspaper or magazine. Some of the listed PROfessionals are EDitorS.
11. Triple sec and vodka cocktail: LEMON DROP.
12. __ nerve: OPTIC. I rely on my OPTIC nerves to connect an image of the puzzle to my brain.
13. Use unwisely: WASTE.
18. Fancy wheels: LIMO. Limousine.
22. Song that's only familiar to superfans: DEEP CUT. A song that is less widely played and less well-known than other songs on the same album or by the same artist.
25. Portfolio options, for short: IRAS. Individual Retirement Accounts.
26. __ bra: narrow-cupped garment: DEMI. Good choice with a low neckline.
27. Ski lift: T-BAR. This basic lift will drag you up the mountain so that you can slide down on your skinny sticks.
30. __ talk: PEP.
31. Spa sound: AAH.
32. "Odyssey" prelude: TROJAN WAR. Odysseus was a Greek hero who fought in the Trojan War and came up with the brilliant idea of the Trojan horse, which allowed the Greeks to enter Troy and end the war. All of that is detailed in Homer's Iliad. In the next book, the Odyssey, our hero struggles for ten years to get home to Ithaca, where his wife Penelope is waiting.
34. Pittsburgh's __ Park: PNC. A stadium in Pittsburgh, named for a local financial services firm.
36. Chicago airport code: ORD.
37. Opposite of paleo-: NEO. Old vs new.
39. "I'm an owl!": HOOT.
40. Zilch: NADA. From the Spanish for nothing.
41. Etc. kin: ET AL. Etc. or "et cetera" is used at the end of a list to mean "and more things like that."
46. Outraged cry: NO FAIR.
49. Brain scan, for short: FMRI. Functional magnetic resonance imaging or functional MRI (fMRI) measures brain activity by detecting changes associated with blood flow.
50. Disgruntled grunt: HUMPH.
51. Eat into: ERODE.
52. Beer garden sound: POLKA.
53. "Odyssey" prelude: ILIAD. Same clue as 32 across, slightly different answer! The Odyssey is an epic poem by Homer. The Iliad is the epic poem by Homer that tells the earlier story of the Trojan War. Here in the Corner, we call that a "clecho" -- a clue echo.
54. Pink cocktail, casually: COSMO. Casual reference to a Cosmopolitan cocktail: vodka, orange liqueur, lime juice, and cranberry juice. Popularized by the TV show "Sex and the City."
59. Not fooled by: ONTO.
61. Last word of a fairy tale: END. Almost "The End" here, too!
62. "__ darn tootin'!": YER. You are absolutely right. A variant of "You're darn tootin'!" I say, This puzzle seemed hard! You say, YER darn tootin'!
63. Pass muster: FLY. Pass muster comes from the military and means "to pass inspection." FLY can also mean to be acceptable. We usually hear it in the negative: "That plan won't fly." Did this puzzle pass muster with you?